Are you are always hard on yourself, you constantly beat yourself up, put yourself last, you don’t feel you are ever good enough, you don’t do what makes you happy or you always take responsibility for other people’s actions?

We’ve all heard and read that self love is the absolute first thing we have to achieve before we can truly love another but how many of us truly love ourselves ???

For a long time, I didn’t know I didn’t love myself. I made decisions based on what other people wanted me to do or were doing, I was insecure and wasn’t truly happy on the inside. I thought living through others was normal and the right thing. I always put others first and didn’t really bother about me. Thank goodness I realized I wasn’t living. I’m learning to love myself more every day.

To love yourself is;

•To Value Your Worth As a Human Being.
Yes, you are special, you are important, you are worthy, you are fabulous. Yes there is someone prettier, smarter, faster, luckier but you are also smart, pretty and lucky you just can’t have it all. You exist for a reason and you have a purpose, a vision to fulfill, so do you and go get it. Yes, you matter! You need to value your contribution to the world.

•To Have An Unconditional Self-Acceptance. 
Love your wrinkled face, your curvy body, your smile, your cellulite, your uneven teeth, your huge forehead, your beautiful imperfections. These are the things that make you you. Before I started my fitness journey, I always body shamed myself and felt I couldn’t look better or live a healthier lifestyle. I was scared of the unknown and wasn’t ready to do anything about it. I had a moment of realization, it took me just one day and that was it. Stop complaining all the time about the things you can change.

•To Find Peace Within Yourself. 
Get in touch with who you really are; connect to yourself, know yourself, what you want, what you need to do and enjoy your own company. Spend time with yourself- you don’t need to be around other people to feel good. Think positive thoughts always because your thoughts basically control your actions.  I never used to congratulate myself and appreciate the effort I put in if the people around me didn’t even though I knew I worked my butt off.

•To Be Kind And Gentle To Yourself
You need to give yourself the love you seek outside from others. Talk to yourself the way you will talk to someone you love. Don’t be hard on yourself. Be kind and good to yourself, love what you do or find something else you love that makes you happy.We always lobby for people’s kind words of appreciation without appreciating ourselves. So, say nice things to yourself every day.

•To Takecare of Your Physical Well Being. 
You can’t wait for someone else to take care of you. You have a right to take care of yourself and do what you enjoy. So exercise, sleep, eat healthy, do yoga, get a haircut or a new hairdo, go on a hike, watch something funny(laughter is good for the soul), book a spa day etc.

Above all, loving yourself is treating yourself the way you will treat anyone you love. Fit in with yourself, be yourself always and not who you believe the world wants to see.

Thanks for reading and have a great week.

Mariam Shittu
xo