If We Were Having Tea #6

If we were having tea, I’d choose a seat in the private part of the café and stare into your eyes for about ten minutes before placing my order. I’d link my hands with yours and catch you up on everything that has happened since we last had tea together. 

If we were having tea, I’d tell you how much I miss you. I’m not sure I’ve ever missed you as much as I miss you right now. I still wish you didn’t have to leave so soon, but I’m comforted by the thought that you’re always with me. Can you remember your three-toned ring you gave me when I was in JS3? I wear it all the time. I make sure to carry a piece of you with me whenever I leave the house. In recent times, some of my friends lost a parent, and I was happy they had me to help them get through the early stages of grief. Yes, I was triggered, but I pulled through because I know you will have wanted me to. 

If we were having tea, I’d tell you how we have all adjusted to the new normal. Masks and sanitizers are items we can’t leave the house without, and social distancing is still a thing. Though December rocks were restricted in Lagos, we were all together again over the holidays. We had some happy moments and some sad moments but everything turned out good in the end. Guess what? We can travel now, but there are so many protocols to be observed, and it makes me uninterested in the process. I’d like to visit somewhere new this year and I hope I  do.

If we were having tea, I’d tell you about my first vision board party. I didn’t know what to expect because it was my first time, but I’m glad I did it because it was special. It was exciting to paste my goals on a board and speak them into existence while listening to 90’s music. I’d show it to you, and I know you’ll be smiling now because of one particular thing in it. 

If we were having tea, I’d tell you about how busy January was for me. Though I anticipated the busyness, I didn’t know it will take a toll on my health. The year is moving so fast, and I need it to slow down—just a little bit—for me to find my bearing. I’ve felt like I have too much to do every day, and 24 hours seem impossible to get them done. I have this unsettling feeling at the pit of my stomach, and I need your words of wisdom now, more than ever. I know you will find the perfect words to make me feel good and set me on a better path for the rest of the year. 

If we were having tea, I will just be taking a sip of my tea because I had forgotten about it. It’ll probably be cold and unsoothing, but I wouldn’t mind because I’m with you.

Love and miss you
Mariam Shittu